The 7 Lessons I’ve Learned in 2021
In the partial post-COVID times. Does it get any better?
1. Take every rejection as redirection.
This applied to my career, dating, and even friendships. Sometimes what you’ve had in mind isn’t what’s best for you. Learn to re-adjust and take everything as it comes, but never stop working your ass off. On this turbulent roller coaster ride of life, it doesn’t get easier, but you get better at dealing with life’s adversities.
When you’re guided by purpose and lead with your heart, everything pans out how it should. Trust yourself and trust the process.
2. It will get real uncomfortable before it gets comfortable in the slightest.
Moving to a new city was such a stressful experience. For a while, nothing was going as planned. Despite the setbacks, I’m beginning to realize that leaving my hometown was the best decision I could have possibly made. Things could have been so much easier if I stayed put, but I didn’t aspire to live out the life of complacency.
With the hustle mentality in America, I’ve learned to be embrace the uncomfortable, because when you hit a rough patch, that’s how you know things will get better from there. As J. Cole has infamously said “There’s beauty in the struggle, ugliness in success”.
3. Slow down and enjoy the ride.
Before even starting graduate school, my social media accounts, and working in a different healthcare system, I had extremely unrealistic expectations of what it should be (i.e. to get straight A’s, grow a loyal following overnight, to acquire the highest-paying travel contracts instantaneously). I’ve learned through this to enjoy the process of growth.
Don’t expect to be at the top when you haven’t even reached the stepping stones to halfway. Tunnel vision is crippling; it blinds you from seeing the 50 shades of grey between the black and white.
Practice the art of stillness. Sometimes being present is more rewarding than the constant movement.
4. Work hard in preserving the genuine friendships that you have. As you grow older, your circle inevitably gets smaller.
Maintaining relationships with loved ones is tough, and it only gets harder as everyone seems to go off in their own paths in life. I’ve always maintained that the right people will come into your life who value you for the qualities that you want to be acknowledged for. At the same time, work hard in preserving the genuine friendships you have.
Show gratitude and appreciation for your friends and family. Never stop giving back.
5. Never lose sight of the humble beginnings.
Working as a bedside nurse during COVID, I understood the audible frustrations of the working class. To work so hard, but to have the system keep beating you down, further exacerbating the inequities that exist. It wasn’t fair, and it felt that no one was looking out for us. As I continue to evolve in my career and beyond, I’m reminded to never stop being an advocate for the voiceless and the marginalized in society.
You haven’t achieved greatness if you’ve failed to bring others up with you.
6. Don’t assume everyone wants your help.
This one has been a difficult pill to swallow, but I’m realizing more and more that ultimately, change has to come from the willingness of the other person. Often times, people don’t want to be helped or don’t see the need to change. Although I have people’s best intentions in mind, it can sometimes inadvertently lead to strained relationships and do more harm than good forcing my views on people who don’t see things the same way.
Practice the art of empathetic listening without forcing your views onto someone else. Sometimes it’s better to sit back and let them come to their own conclusions.
7. Stop trying to find so much purpose and contentment in your career. There’s so much to live for beyond your job.
This has also been difficult to digest. I’m fortunate nursing has taught me so many lessons about health & humanity, has grounded me in purpose, and provides financial stability. I’m still passionate about what I do and have no regrets choosing nursing, but I’m slowly coming to terms with how this job has also caused crippling anxiety and has left my soul feeling drained after many long shifts.
The harsh reality is that despite how much value you believe you add to your workplace, your employer does not care about you as much as you think. We’ve heard stories of healthcare workers being forced to reuse PPE for weeks, and of employees being fired on a Zoom call. You’re easily replaceable by your employer, but you are irreplaceable to yourself and to your loved ones.
Redefine what lights up your soul and ground yourself in purpose. Keep chasing what you’re passionate about beyond your 9–5 or 7–7.
